Because I sure haven’t…
I’ve been sat here with my laptop for almost an hour now, drank three mugs of hot chocolate, done some online shopping on my phone for things I know I don’t need and scrolled through social media when I really should be writing some blog content. As much is Boots is happy that I’ve been sat down long enough that he can have some lovely cuddles, it does make me feel like a pretty rubbish blogger.
I feel immensely better to know that it’s not just me. In fact, it seems that almost everyone is struggling at the moment in terms of motivation. Be they fellow content creators or otherwise.
November has always felt like a bit of a nothing month for me. A ‘filler’ month, it you will. We’re over the excitement of Halloween, but we’re not quite at the point that we can get into the full swing of Christmas. Everyone knows a Grinch who hates hearing the ‘C’ work in November – spoiler alert, if you don’t know one, it’s probably you. It leaves us in a weird sense of limbo between the two celebrations. That coupled with pitch black evenings, and miserable weather just makes for a bit of a dull month.
The last few days have been rainy, cold, and dark. With absolutely miserable and uninspiring weather, it’s really no surprise that we just want to snuggle up in a pile of blankets and hide away from the world. Yet I still find myself feeling guilty, even scolding myself, telling myself that I must spent time taking flatlay photos, even though its dark and lighting is a major struggle. That I must write enough content to post more than just my usual once a week. That the content must be absolutely amazing.
It’s not just getting in my own head and weather that’s getting in the way, I’m met with the challenge that I currently have no internet. We moved house on the 16th November, and we’re not set to get internet until at least mid-December. It’s adding a whole extra element of difficulty on top of something that I’m already being very ‘meh’ about. I’d usually write my posts straight onto the blog, and when I’m happy with what I’ve put together, I post it. At the moment I’m writing at home using a word document, saving it onto a memory stick, bringing it to work and moving the word document to my work computer and then copying it onto the blog during my lunch break. What a faff.
I typically post in the morning, so I’m then having to go back to the blog again on my phone and try and function with a teeny tiny screen, to add my photos and post it, whilst also being mindful of the amount of data I’m using.
I caught myself then wondering, why am I putting such pressure on myself? No one is going to think you are a terrible person because you have a lapse in motivation, it happens to everyone. Sure, you may lose a couple of followers, but if they unfollow because you haven’t posted for a few days they probably weren’t that interested anyway.
I need to remind myself that this is a hobby, and that interests in hobbies, along with the motivation to pursue them will naturally change with your mood and other commitments. You can’t force it, and to try to do so will just make it so much worse. So I’m taking a step back. I’m not going to put needless and unhelpful pressure on myself to churn posts out just so that I have new content. I need to listen to what my mind and body are telling me, and allow myself the break I so clearly need.
So there will be no more apologies , no sorrys because I haven’t posted for a while. My mind needs a refresh, and a little break to allow it to function.
Self care and rest must always come first, and that’s exactly what I intend to do.